Thursday, April 08, 2010

THIS BUGS ME

OK. Shhh. I'm supposed to be watching a movie right now (The chipmunks Squeakquel) but the dude who plays Dave was the same voice actor who played Underdog. So every time I hear Dave talk I'm looking around for that stupid SuperDog!

And the chipmunks are staying with some dude named Toby who is a complete and total retard, playing X box all day long, not feeding them, and I doubt he will make sure they bathe either.

Men need women to keep them on their toes. If no chick is there to ensure they eat, and bathe and sleep when it is dark out, well, med would pretty much FAIL.

The best vitamins for men is a woman.

FACT.

However. Some women, like some vitamins, have directions that need to be followed. SO :


Men, you may think you have a command of the English language, but when it comes to communicating with women, you may be surprised. Here is our dictionary of Womanese. Master these terms and you'll find your relationship with women greatly improved.
The Real Definition of Words When Used By Women
JOKES - Differences Between Men and Woman

1. Fine - I am right. This argument is over. You need to shut up.

2. That's Okay - One of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think hard and long before deciding when and how you'll pay for your mistake.

3. Nothing - The calm before the storm. This means "Something" and you better be on your toes. Note: Arguments that start with "Nothing" usually end with "Fine" (See #1).

4. Five Minutes - If getting dressed, this means half an hour. (Don't be mad about this. It's the same definition for you when it's your turn to do some chores around the house.)

5. Thanks - A woman is thanking you. Do not question this or faint. Just say, "You're welcome," and let it go.

6. Loud Sigh - Not actually a word but rather a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. It means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is standing here wasting her time arguing with you about "Nothing." (See #3)

7. Go Ahead - This is a dare, not permission. (Don't Do It!)

8. Don't worry about it, I got it - The second most dangerous statement a woman can make. It means that a woman has asked a man several times to do something and is now doing it herself. (This will result in you asking at a later date, "What's wrong?" For the woman's response, see #3.)

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